Ben Cayetano claims that next Tuesday's transit of venus is just another pro-rail publicity stunt.
Ben Cayetano claims that next Tuesday's transit of Venus is just another pro-rail publicity stunt.

Today, Ben Cayetano called a press conference to denounce the upcoming transit of the planet Venus across the face of the Sun.  Astronomers say the event occours only once every hundred years.  But, Cayetano claims it’s just more pro-rail propaganda and urges people to ignore it.

“The only people around here with the kind of money that it takes to stage his kind of nonsense is HART and Pacific Resource Partners (pro rail groups),” said Cayetano. “So, do you think it’s a coincidence that Hawaii’s the ‘best place to see it” and it’s called a “transit?”  Cayetano continued, “This is  a clear misuse of taxpayers’ money and I’m going to sue the city!”

“This is obviously timed to distract the public from my BRT plan,” lamented Ben. He promised a large ‘stop transit’ rally next Tuesday to coincide with the astronomical event. “You can’t fool us!,” proclaimed Cayetano!

When a reporter suggested that the transit of a planet across the sun cannot be staged no matter how much money you have Cayetano became furious and accused the media of being “bought off.”

“If you don’t retract that statement, I will sue you!” shouted Cayetano.

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